Breakfast Business
This morning Marty decided that since he had eaten a banana, breakfast was over and he deserved a treat. When I told him that we didn’t have treats after breakfast, he began a rather heartfelt crying jag. As I sat on the floor with Marty on my lap and attempted to console him, Lauren the litigator took a seat on the book basket and gazing down from her perch, stepped in to gently explain the situation to me:
L: Mommy, I think he is upset because he really wants a treat.
M: I know Lauren, but we don’t have treats after breakfast.
L: Daddy gives us treats after breakfast.
M: No, he doesn’t.
L: Well, on Halloween Daddy gave us peeps right after breakfast. I think he’s just more fun than you.
M: Halloween was a special day. He doesn’t give you treats every day after breakfast.
L: I know, but that’s because he’s in Afghanistan.
M: I gave you peeps after breakfast on Easter, didn’t I? See, I’m pretty fun.
L: Erin gave us peeps before breakfast on Easter.
M: Uncle.
Perhaps Lauren found the clarity and energy for her argument in the three bowls of Clifford Crunch she had eaten. We bought Clifford Crunch after the bastards at Kellogs discontinued Tiger Power.
As you can see it is organic with whole grains! Wonderful!
They made their box out of 100% recycled paperboard! Commendable! They participate in box tops for education! Admirable! And yet, a bowl of Clifford Crunch looks like this.
I never had a cat but I have seen Meow Mix commercials. Little fish and little x’s and little arrows – isn’t this cat food? If they bought the old cutting dies from a cat food company, I applaud them for recycling, but I think they should include this in their marketing so that people know why their kids' breakfast cereal looks like a meow meal. Otherwise, I think they should evaluate the mental health of their marketers and developers, because if the cereal is not going to look like people food, I think it should at least look like dog food – bones, fire hydrants, piles of fur perhaps.
L: Mommy, I think he is upset because he really wants a treat.
M: I know Lauren, but we don’t have treats after breakfast.
L: Daddy gives us treats after breakfast.
M: No, he doesn’t.
L: Well, on Halloween Daddy gave us peeps right after breakfast. I think he’s just more fun than you.
M: Halloween was a special day. He doesn’t give you treats every day after breakfast.
L: I know, but that’s because he’s in Afghanistan.
M: I gave you peeps after breakfast on Easter, didn’t I? See, I’m pretty fun.
L: Erin gave us peeps before breakfast on Easter.
M: Uncle.
Perhaps Lauren found the clarity and energy for her argument in the three bowls of Clifford Crunch she had eaten. We bought Clifford Crunch after the bastards at Kellogs discontinued Tiger Power.
As you can see it is organic with whole grains! Wonderful!
They made their box out of 100% recycled paperboard! Commendable! They participate in box tops for education! Admirable! And yet, a bowl of Clifford Crunch looks like this.
I never had a cat but I have seen Meow Mix commercials. Little fish and little x’s and little arrows – isn’t this cat food? If they bought the old cutting dies from a cat food company, I applaud them for recycling, but I think they should include this in their marketing so that people know why their kids' breakfast cereal looks like a meow meal. Otherwise, I think they should evaluate the mental health of their marketers and developers, because if the cereal is not going to look like people food, I think it should at least look like dog food – bones, fire hydrants, piles of fur perhaps.
posted by Shannon at 9:07 PM
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